Just some new stuff.....and maybe a cute picture or two :0)

Bonding......

 I have been told I am being hard on myself now that we have Aregash home.  Sometimes I agree, it's just that things aren't just cut-n-dry like I thought they would be.  We are working really hard on the bonding that happens when a family adopts, but there are always those rules that were meant to be broken.....or were they?  I feel as though the bond between Aregash and myself is pretty strong, but it's a struggle with her and her daddy.  When she is upset with me I have just been giving it some time and she always softens with hugs and kisses.  With her daddy it's a bit different.  He doesn't do anything for her to be upset about (I get to be the bad "guy" on purpose), but she still determines when she will give him the time of day.  So we have been really watchful when we are with other people to make sure that she is only held by her daddy or me.  This is hard.  It's hard to tell someone they can't hold her....to get them to understand without a lengthy discussion... that every time she goes to a "stranger" it can hinder the relationship she has with her dad.  The really difficult part is that she prefers men, but not always, and sometimes she surprises us when she has been soo clingy to me and she won't even go to her dad, but she'll go to a stranger who holds their arms out.  Some times I have just said "No", other times I let her go and pull her right back in.  It's not easy to tell grandpa that he can't hold his grand-daughter when he's only met her one or two times.  I can't tell you how hard.  Cause he doesn't "get" it, she doesn't get it, and it leaves me feeling like I can't do anything right.  I have been told that every time someone other than my husband or myself hold her we take a step back in our attachment.  Our social worker told me to go with my instincts. So this is what my instincts tell me.......that Aregash has "met" her Grandma Gail a handful of times.....she knows that she is Grandma....she can call her by name.  My mom can hold her.  I feel comfortable with it now.  What I'm not okay with is some "random" (and I say random not because I don't know them, but because SHE doesn't know them from the next person) holds their arms out and scoops her up.  So she doesn't have a firm attachment to Dic yet.  What have I just done by letting her go?  It isn't fair to her daddy.  So why is it so hard to say something????  Can all of you just READ this and try to comprehend it so I don't have to explain it in detail every time??  Thanks. :0)  Am I making to big of a deal?  Sometimes I think I am....other times I know that my persistence will only help the father/daughter relationship.  I wish I could set her down and not have to worry.  I'm just gonna wear a sign.....and put one on her too.  PLEASE DON'T HOLD THE BABY.  Decision made. :0).

Today our church threw our family a shower to welcome Aregash home.  
It was lovely.  
Here are some pictures.  
We LOVE our church family.

such pretty colors

the cake had the tree from our shirts on it--so sweet...thanks Dominique!

she is just beginning to get into the gift opening a little

We all wore our traditional Ethiopian garb......
'cept for the daddio.
We neglected to find something for him
in our 15 minute shopping spree
before we left Addis.
So sad.

 when we got home I got some shots of my cutie pa-tooties

what a dolly

brothers celebrating with their sister

snuggly siblings

 and then she asked, "Mommy, photo Aregash baby?"
 .....of course precious girl.

 

I have a lot to write about.

I promise I'll do that soon.

The clock just ticks too quickly lately.

Time to give all my love to my LOVES.

Sending off my wedding clothes....Read more about it

I am excited about this great event!!!  

Go HERE to read about it!

I'm ironing some of the boys' shirts they've outgrown, finding a few ties that match and mailing them out!  What an idea!!

I'm Happy

I finally got the Valentine shot--
not exactly what I was hoping for, 
but they're all pretty stink'n cute, huh?

Today I announced that I am taking the big leap and I'm giving up Face Book for awhile...on my own, without any pressures.....it's ALLLLL me!  And It makes me happy.  I also changed my status on the adoption forum I am a part of so I don't get 100 emails a day.  It's time to give many things more attention.....including my husband, my boys and my sweet baby girl.  I have been on this computer almost non-stop for as long as I can remember.  First I researched the agencies, then I joined adoption groups, then I began selling t-shirts to help pay for our adoption expenses, and then there is that darn Face Book.  It's been a great tool, a super sounding-board, a place for lots of love and support on this longggg journey we've been on.  But I am ready to step away and pretend the computer is just a computer (kinda like a dog is JUST a dog :0).  I will continue to journal here and add pictures when I get them and tell stories about our transitioning.  But, I will NOT be held prisoner any longer!!  Just jok'n...I did it to myself. :)  So please hang in there and if you don't usually comment cause you do it on Face Book....well, pull up an account and let's talk (or YOU talk and I'll listen. :0)  The sun is shining today. The laundry is getting done.  And I feel happy.  

Valentine Drama

 some were feeling the love....
some were not.

 she's screaming...
if you can't tell.

 now she's laughing.  
wundim (brother) cole!!! 
she loves him.  
and it's reciprocated.

 i'm pretty sure he never got the smackers. 
in fact,
i think he's still trying. :0)

We are starting to feel the "groove" of things in our house again.  Aregash is understanding more English, while she teaches us every day.  I have had some good talks (which I know she only understand parts of) about how we act when things don't go our way......how to say "No, Thank you"...or in her case "No, Tank-you", which is equally accepted :0) when she doesn't like something instead of "Blech"...... how when Mommy puts the mounds of conditioner in your hair we don't want to rinse it out right away--"Mommy does it", I always say.  So, there is a lot of learning and a lot of teaching going on in this house right now and it's working.  Sometimes the melt-down is inevitable and I have seen that it just has to run it's course without intervention.  And the patience I prayed for for years is finally paying off (that's cause it's finally happening...the patience part, the praying part is continual).
It isn't a cake walk, but nobody said it was gonna be.
And I'm sure I'm still going to have "those days".......
but now there have been a couple that have been pretty good.
And I'm happy.

 I

Am

 Happy.

Valentine Sweethearts

 I told myself I would send out an announcement for Valentine's Day.......

but this is about as far as I got......

and I couldn't pick just one to post..........

so I gave them all........

 it's the sweetest thing I have for Valentine's Day........

can't resist the smiles..........

and I only have one of all four sweets together.......

 

even though I got us all dressed up for pictures today at church..............

 this is it friends...........

so maybe Easter announcements????

Have a 

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY 

with YOUR

sweets!!

I LOVED this and wanted to share!

This is my friend, Melanie and her family...as well as some of her fellow teachers at the school she and her husband teach at in Oman.  They took this photo the day we found out we were having some issues with our paperwork in Ethiopia...while in Ethiopia.  Love the rallying that went on for us around the world!!!  And guess what?  It worked!!  If you would like to take a picture in YOUR shirts, please send them to cholo5@wescomm.com so I can post them here!!!  THANKS!!!!  and we LOVE you, Mel!!

Updated Picture...or 2 :0)

We are home, we happy, and we are tired.  WE haven't had a toddler around the house (other than nieces and nephews) for awhile now.  We are re-living the melt-downs, tantrums, drama....you name it.  With the language barrier it makes it that more difficult, but we are excited to see what comes of it all.  Teaching boundaries, and learning more of God's grace each day.  Here are some recent pictures of Aregash.  

She's still REALLLLL cute!

 YES...she's dressed!!

 Our first outing to Target :0)

Things tend to get a little lot ugly sometimes.....it's not always peachy, but we're working on it.  The boys were trying to help us get her jammies on.  She is REAL particular about what happens to be ON the jammies (clothes) like flowers...not such a big fan.